The Godot Principle
by 41Naf-Redips
Summary: Based on the story of Godot, Amy and Howard are put in a car together.


The Godot Principle  
><span> By: 41Naf_Redips

It was a muggy evening in the overheated van of Bernadtte Rostenkowski. Howard, sitting there with the faulty A/C, mulling over how much he did not want to be here. To be precise, the parking lot of the Pasadeana Mall for the midnight maddness sale at JC Penny's for which Bernadette, Penny and Amy Farah-Fowler were currently spending copious amounts of money at. It was not going to be a short event, as the massive lines Bernie texted him about at the store entrance. All this just so his fiance promised him that they could roleplay as any superhero couple he wanted next time they had sex.

His closet had many superhero outfits, so the hardest part to this was thinking which superheroine would coordinate better when a tapping noise came and startled him.

"Hi, Howard" said Amy, carrying a small bag.

"Hey... Where are the rest of the women-folk?" he asked as she climbed in.

"Oh, they barely started by the time I left. It was a very mediocre going, I only purchased some socks. I feel the joys of being a woman clothes shopping is an overdone and overblown source of hocum and outdated gender stereotyping"

"Wow, its like Sheldon never left for Santa Maria with Leonard and Raj for the weekend"

"Oh, thank you. I'm glad you won't be too lonesome without his company" Amy replied, detecting no sense of sarcasm whatsoever.

Howard gave a sigh and went back to fantasing Bernie dressed as Starfire from DC Comics, as she undid the purple straps over her-

"Pardon me, Howard"

"What?"

"Sorry to disrupt your thought process, but I didn't pack my cellphone. Could you text Penny and ask how much longer she'll take, please?"

"Sure" he then typed to Penny's cellphone and waited for a response. A full minute and a half went by with no repy. He guessed that she screens his texts to her after the failed attempt of engaging in phone sex a long time back and tried Bernie's cell. Again, no reply.

"Well, this is terrific"

"I agree with your sarcasm. Its far too muggy for waiting for them"

Howard nodded and agreement and fiddled with the radio. When no good songs came on, he went back to silence. Sweating due to bad A/C, silence.

"So... Amy... How's Sheldon?" asked Howard, hoping to liven up the car.

"He's doing well, but technically as his closest aquaintence, shouldn't you know how he is as well?"

"Well, your his girl-"

"Girl who is both a girl and his friend"

"Right, as that. Anyway, I meant relationship wise"

"The same level of platonic friendship as usual"

"Right. Anyway, has Sheldon shown you any fanboy movies yet?"

"Yes. So far we've seen the JJ Abrams Star Trek, the first two Star Wars movies and the three Lord of the Rings films"

"What did you think of them?"

"Well... Mindless science fiction and pointless additions visual wise to the armors of many characters I read about in Junior High"

"What were your original visions of the armors?"

"For one, the riders of Rohan bearing resemblence towards the Norman warriors"

"That's interesting" Howard replied with a genuine interest. "One sec, let me just check with Bernie again"

And again no reply.

"So you really liked Lord of the Rings?"

"I guess. The history paralells were very engaging"

"Yeah, those were cool..." Howard said as the conversation was sinking once again.

Another minute passed.

"My turn" chirped Amy happily. "Would you like to play the alternate history game? "

"Uhh, I guess so. You start"

"Excellent, this one stumped Sheldon momentairly. If Hitler never rose to power in the late thirties, how would the world react to the growing trend of eugenics based genetic cleansing?"

Howard had to think this one through. As a jewish guy, this was a touchy subject. But as a guy wanting to make the nanoseconds move faster, he had to entertain the oddball.

"I dunno... The world loses the "If you believe in something, Hitler did too arguement?"

"Incorrect" she replied, as if she was holding it in. "Without Hitler's useage of eugenics uncovered, America and the rest of the world install ethnic cleansing of the mentally impaired, crippled, foreign and homosexual populace by advice of people such as the Mensa organization"

"Wow"

"It's alright, you wouldn't have thought of it with the lack of a PhD"

"That's not funny" he said, insulted. He had to move his self forward to make his clothes stop sticking to the seat.

"Why? Me and Sheldon use it lighten the mood when you're not around, I thought it would work here"

"Well, it doesn't!"

"Penny and the rest of your social circle laughs at it"

"Wonderful, I love being the punchline for you people"

"Bernadtte hasn't"

"Good for her" Howard said bitterly at her. Its not easy being considered the odd man out in his group of friends. He may as well been the Bug's Life movie for his gang of Pixar movies. Amy would be the Cars movie.

"Do you think they're still here?" Amy inquired

"Huh?"

"Penny and Bernadette"

"Why wouldn't they be?"

"Many things could have happened"

"Like?"

"Well, there could be a robbery for all we know. Or the two of them could have chased off with two other men... or one guy or two women, all ending in possible coitus"

At this point in time, Howard wasn't sure that the extended dampness of the humidity, the thoughts of Bernadette leaving him for another (presumeably a taller man like Professor Glenn from the Study Symposium on Social Interaction) or, most likely, the sheldon like-genius that's been pushing his buttons the past hour.

"I usually reserve this for Sheldon, but as he's not here... What is wrong with you!" he injected with a despised tone

"Pardon?"

"No one likes to hear about how his fiance is going to sleep with another guy, no one likes waiting for his girlfriend in a gillion degrees of heat with a weirdo that can't take a hint of not wanting to hear about his girlfriend !

The car grew gravely silent. the mugginess was at a high, both him and Amy were sweating profoundly. In midst of the silence, he tried Bernie's cell once more. No reply.

It was about 1:15 am now, luckily his mother din't call due to their understanding of him spending the night with Bernie. Another 10 minutes passed, as Howard peered into the mirror.

You couldn't guess it, but it looked like his words fazed her. Her eyes seemed... telling of her emotions. They looked saddned, to say the most.

"Are you okay, Amy?" he asked with concern.

Amy was silent. It did look like she was upset.

"It's just the heat, its making me cranky. I'm really sorry, are we good?" he asked, giving a goofy "please forgive me hun" he uses for Bernie.

"I did not mean to anger you... I was just hoping to be fun like Sheldon..."

"Seriously? Sheldon's fun?"

"Yes. We have alot of fun together"

Howard could barely believe this. However, he did have one sarcastic remark up his sleeve...

"This actually makes sense now... He uses up all the fun he has on you and never on us! You should be grateful for that"

Amy gave a smile.

"Your thesis, how short it is, seems to be based on truth"

"Not bad for a non-PhD possesing engineer, eh?"

"I suppose. Its getting really late, I've got to check my monkey to see if it tore up the house to get more cigarettes"

"Just like my mom with Oreos. Let's get you home"

After dropping Amy off at her home, Howard stumbled onto the bed. Too tired to think of where Bernadette was, he closed his eyes and went to sleep. Then his phone rang with a text saying she'd be a another minute at the store.

"Crap!" said the tired Howard.

The End.


End file.
